Robin Beck

Sylvia 10/14/1995 - 9/20/2009

Sylvia had gone down hill rapidly the last few days. There were too many things wrong to treat. Tumors were growing again. She had canine hip dysplasia, peripheral vestibular disease, bad eyesight, a bad paw, a bladder infection, and finally GI bloating. She starting refusing food and water on Saturday morning, so I gave her water and chicken broth, with her dissolved pain meds, through a syringe. She was awake, breathing poorly, and crying until 4 AM Sunday. At that point, she could barely move. For most of the night, I sat up, held her, chanted, and played youtubes for her. She especially liked Enya; also the Great Compassion Mantra, and my voice also calmed her. She would calm down a bit, then start crying again. I finally got her calmed down and asleep about 4 AM; with liquid children's benedryl. Then I got a little sleep too.

I had just heard about using benedryl as a canine sedative a few days ago. I bought some for a grandchild the day before; and the pharmacist gave me a syringe to measure the child's dose properly. At Syvia's size, I could have given the her 3O plus ml, but 15 did it. BTW, the grandkid went home Saturday evening, so he did not have witness Sylvia's passing. At 5:30, I woke up and checked on Sylvia. She was sleeping on her side, and breathing gently. She stretched her legs and moved her head a bit, so I think she knew I was there. At 8 AM, my wife noticed Sylvia was not breathing and got me up. Sylvia was still in the same position; so I think she went peacefully. A pet cremation service, from a nearby town, came and got her at 10:30 AM. We were fortunate to find someone on a Sunday Morning, especially out here in the 'boonies.'

One other thing. Our youngest son brought the dog home when he was in high school; the winter of 1995, He has been back east working, and planned to visit in a few weeks. We hoped Sylvia could hang on long enough to say goodbye to him. On Friday, we got a letter from him. I dropped the envelope on the floor. Sylvia immediately came over, smelled it, started wagging her tail, and 'was smiling.' I guess that sort of completed the circle for her, all the humans she had been assigned to protect were fine; and she could go to the Rainbow Bridge.

Paving Paradise, or Pacifying the Jungle?

There seems to be a comon theme in religions. There is somehow a natural order to things. Humans violate that; and wind up suffering catastrophes. Often, there is a concept of an idealized, pristine past, when all was well. Then, at some point, humanity messed up; and descended into an evil age. Finally, there is also concept of a future age; when either righteousness and justice shall be restored, or else humanity will be wiped out.

I am not so sure about the natural order business. It seems to me that if humans lived according to the natural order; then we would have gone the way of most species long ago. I sort of remember reading or hearing a discussion about psychopaths. It was a number of years ago, so my recollection is a tad foggy. One woman suggested that it is not surprising that some of us go off on killing and other crime sprees. In her mind, what was surprising is that it happens to so few. I think she was a psychiatrist with a background in genetics. Her take seemed to be that we are hard wired for greed, aggression, and such; so the psychopath is simply acting upon natural, but suppressed, drives.

This popped into my mind-stream during a cyber-discussion about Rissho Ankoku Ron.
I got to thinking. There is a federal area near hear here, where humans are not allowed, I guess it supposed to be a nature refuge of some sort. It appears to consist largely of overcrowded, stunted trees; tangled brambles and other undergrowth; all manner of noxious weeds; and stagnant, foul smelling water. I can not imagine what kind of creatures could possibly dwell there; other than mosquitoes, spiders, snakes, rats, and similar vermin. It is as if the benevolent kami left, and demons took their place. I suspect it reflects what much of this area, where I presently live, would look like; if not for human activity; if it were pristine

There is also a forestry, fish, and wildlife area not too far away. Access for humans is somewhat limited; but the land and waters are actively managed. Some highly regulated fishing and hunting is allowed. Swamps are drained into ponds; which are stocked with game fish. The trees are thinned; underbrush is cleared, and noxious weeds are controlled. Patches of berries, millet, sunflowers, hickory, walnuts, and desirable prairie grasses are cultivated. Game birds {turkeys, quail, and so on} are stocked. It is a beautiful area, where deer, birds, and other desirable wildlife thrive. I think the benevolent divinities dwell there.

It seems like there is a faith, in some circles, that nature, when left to its own devices, is somehow pure and wholesome; while human influence is unnatural and always bad. That is a common theme to the lyrics of some 1960's protest songs; such as Joni Mitchell's "Big Yellow Taxi." I have thought that way at times; but am now inclined to think otherwise, by almost 180 degrees. Well, maybe 135? The interesting thing, to me, is that the humans are more than just beasts of the jungle; we seem to have some kind of higher spiritual nature. When things go well, this divinity is reflected in the natural environment. However, I do not think it happens by itself; it is not the natural order. Nature, left unchecked, makes swamps and tangled jungles; which are inhabited by creepy vermin. Humans can, and often strive to, make the world a better place; one that is beautiful, blissful, stable, and pure.

I am thinking that our goodness really makes no sense, without positing some source for the divine within us. That is why our tendency to be as good as we are surprised that psychiatrist. In an effort to explain it, many resort to Theism. Dean Hamer's 'god gene' is one of the only rational theories I have heard that explains it within the scope of natural selection. See: The Brain Chemistry of the Buddha. My take is that this could have evolved as a way of dealing with anxiety; with dukkha.

Briefly, humans are the one species that can kind of 'foresee' the future. While foresight is a biological advantage; it also enables us to know that the future includes our own death. Meanwhile, all sentient beings are hardwired with an anxiety / panic response. This causes them to fear, and therefore avoid, the unknown; or at least approach it with extreme caution. For that reason, life, for humans, truly should be constant dukkha. The angst, from living with the foreknowledge that we are going to die, should be panic level, so overwhelming, that we can not even function. So natural selection had an answer, a 'spirituality gene.' It enables humans to live comfortably with the awareness that we are going to die. Without it, maybe we would ALL be psychopathic.

An aside -- religion gets a lot of grief from certain quarters too. Some claim it is responsible for all manner of evils. I think that is utter poppycock. The baser instincts, such as territorialism; which the Buddha called afflictions. are the roots of war and other 'evils.' That we see them as afflictions is rather remarkable; as they are competitive advantages in the natural order. Religion actually tends to keep these afflictions in check; but sometimes fails. Religion itself gets infected with afflictions; which should not be surprising. The territorial instinct gets sublimated as the desire to influence and control the beliefs and behavior of others. Healthy culture turns into cultural ethnocentrism, and so on. Religion can become a vehicle for that. I do not know if that is really a corruption of religion. It seems to be the natural course of events. Nature, left unchecked, makes swamps and tangled jungles; which are inhabited by creepy vermin.

That said,

I am not offering any definitive answer. Just some food for thought. There is no doubt in my mind that humans possess an innate higher spiritual nature. While innate, it does not come naturally, our better selves are like seeds that have to be cultivated. As for the source of the seed of this higher nature, the 'god gene' is just one hypothesis that might make sense. I do think religion is necessary to cultivate the seed. That religion all too often goes sour just further demonstrates that our better natures are not the default option.

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Remembrance; Did that Really Happen?

I had been out walking the dog. When I came in, I saw the video of a plane flying into the WTC. My wife was watching FNC; but did not know what was going. My first thought was it was a simulation or something; then I thought it must have been an accident. I thought back to January 28, 1986; when I saw the challenger blow up, live on dozens of screens. I had been looking for a cartridge to fit an old Fisher turntable, and tracked one down at one of the rent to own shops. My first words, on both occasions, were, "Did that really just happen."

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Buddhist Words for Power: Life Force

This came up in a discussion. Someone inquired about the meaning of life force in Buddhism; they wanted to know if this is a real Buddhist concept. I had my doubts, but, as it turns out, there is such word. The problem is, when we hear the words 'life force,' most of us think of something like 'the force' from the movies. There are Buddhist words that imply something like 'the force;' but 'life force' is probably not one of them.

The Sanskrit word for Life-force is jivitendriya; the kanji is 命根 {myokon}. The Indic word is composed of two words, jivita and indriya. Indopedia has;

"जीवितम् Jīvitam (Sanskrit; Pali, jīvitaŋ, "living, lived through (a period of time); returned to life") in Buddhism, one of thirteen mind- dissociated (cittaviprayukta) integrators."

Jivita is the part that means life. There are several words that are probably related, jatam; which meand born, jiv; which means to live, jiva; which is a living being, and jivata; which means living, animation, or having lived. One source indicates that iivitam refers to the duration of a life; another translates it as animation. The kanji, 命 {myo}; means ones fate, life, or destiny. [We see this kanji in 歸命 {kimyo}, a translation of namo, namas, namah; which means to devote one's life.]

The other word is indriya. In addition to force, this is also translated as faculty. It is not necessarily an energy; but rather something that facilitates. The sense organs are called indriya; because they facilitate sense perception. The likely root word is indh; which means something like "to kindle." [Some sources suggest indu; which means to drop, as a drop of soma or rain, and is the source of the names Indus, India, and Hindu.] The kanji, 根 {kon}, literally means root. Indriya is a root faculty that kindles or facilitates and controls.

Finally, when we see life force referenced in Buddhism, the operative word is "Jivitendriya;" which mean Life Faculty. There is a related word; ayus-jivata 壽命 {jumyo} that means life-span. Ayus means life itself, and jivata indicates a time of animation or to be animated. There are also several words that can mean force or power. He is a brief list:

Indriya 根 {kon}: Controlling principle or faculty; that which facilitates.

Vala, Bala 力 {riki}: Strength, physical power, influence; from the same linguistic root as valor.

Virya 精進 {shjin} or 勤 {gon}; which means vigor, diligence, vitality, exertion, elan, passion, endeavor, industry, fortitude, ambition, enthusiasm, drive, effort, bravado, courage, zeal, It is not physical strength; but more like strength of character. This is thought to come from the root as virile.

Prana 気 [ki]: Congates include pneuma and plenus; it is the breathe of life, energy currents, a sort of pervasive force of beings and natural processes that flows within and without us. 気 is generally romanized as qi or chi, which are from Chinese readings.