Earlier this month I attended my usual study meeting in the San Jose area. This time my youngest daughter came with me. There were 5 other women attending. For the last year we have been reading from a SGI booklet called The Road Map to Happiness (I think that is the correct title). It's purpose is to help explain SGI Buddhism. It is meant for beginners, but we always find something to get a discussion going. I don't remember what we were reading about, but a discussion about chanting started and I finally brought up chanting about stuff. I had to define "Stuff." I said, "You know... stuff!", but that didn't work so I said personal things or wishes or needs. Yes, I rambled like that. So one woman tells of a member who really wanted a top of the line Mercedes. That was her great desire. Somehow she got the car, but I don't know if that caused her indestructible happiness or not. Another woman said her son was accepted to college, but had no transportation. She was chanting for her son to be able to get to college. We continued this discussion and sometimes agreed, sometimes disagreed and had a great discussion. My daughter didn't say anything in the meeting, but in the car she was so excited and talked about the meeting and her views on some of the subjects. This was a new experience for her. She had never been to a SGI meeting where everyone had opinions and spoke their mind. It was a good meeting.
Later I continued to think about chanting for stuff. There is a member in my area, I have written about her before, who chants for very specific stuff. She decides what she needs and chants for it to happen by a specific time of day. I can't do this because I don't believe it. So I don't chant for anything in that specific way. I feel it is "Substituting faith for wisdom." I have faith that this will happen, even if it is not the best for me. Your mileage my vary. Now in that I have faith.
Several years ago our family went to a big meeting in San Francisco - Oct. 5 or May 3 or one of those big dates. We were sitting up in the balcony stage left looking down on the stage. A man came on stage to give his experience. He told of being destitute as a young man, the typical experience. Then he gave money or chanted or introduced some folks of all of the above, but now he was really, really wealthy. He had the best cars and a big house and vacation houses. When his family went on vacation, they chartered a jet and went to private islands. The guy just went on and on. Was I supposed to be impressed? I wasn't, I was embarrassed. Is money what this practice is about?
Last week I sat down to chant for an hour. That was my intent, but about 30 minutes in, an idea popped into my head and I couldn't get it out. It was time to clean up my environment. I stopped chanting and started writing down everything I needed/wanted to do in my house. Then day by day I have been working on the list. The kids took down the ratty curtains and rods in the altar room and I took the fake greens off my altar. Now the room is so much more open. Never liked those fake greens. I packed away most of Greg's clothes and cleaned up his closet. Something happened that day when I was chanting. I wasn't chanting for anything specific, just happy to connect with the gohonzon and my life. It seems that I did just that, connect with my life.