Diary of a Chapter Leader

Nancy,

I read an article in a recent running magazine about vitamin D deficiency. Evidently, several runners, who thought they were being wise by using sunscreen to prevent skin cancer, broke bones and, when tested, were found to have severe vitamin D deficiencies.

Did they put you on calcium/vitamin D supplements?

Just vitamin D for now. My doctor says "they" are considering changing it from a vitamin to a hormone. My mother has very low vitamin D - she reminded me this morning. Hey, my bones can't be that bad, I ran over my legs with a truck and had no broken bones!

I , too have very low vit. D ..
I had to quit taking the high dose pills, they were making me feel so sick to my stomach....
good luck Nancy:)

Nancy,

I have been on the cusp of joining SGI for a year and a half now. What's kept me from joining is some members' seeming deification of Ikeda. What draws me to the organization is the practice of chanting and talking with the non-zealot members I've met in the D.C. area. Your site, which I discovered while your husband was still alive, lets me know that I wouldn't be the only independent-thinking person in the organization.

I had decided to take steps to receive a Gohonzon after a lecture at the new Culture Center in D.C. last Wednesday. I raised questions/concerns after the lecture, which was on the mentor-disciple relationship. I was told that I would not have to "declare" Ikeda as my "mentor in life" to join. I made it clear that I don't see Ikeda as my mentor, may never see him as my mentor and won't regard him as such in the future, unless I feel an authentic, inner-driven connection to him.

Today, however, I started to think maybe I shouldn't get a Gohonzon after all. More members than not, whom I meet, get glassy-eyed when they mention Ikeda and are dogmatic to boot. So I came to your site tonight, after a long hiatus, to see what you've been up to, organizationally speaking.

I hope you don't mind this lengthy note from a stranger. Please share your thoughts, if you choose.

Best,
Nicki

Nicki,
I hope you don't mind me putting in my two cents worth and for what it's worth, there'll probably be change left over.
I consider myself SGI but there are those inside SGI-USA who don't because of my actions. There are those outside of SGI-USA who don't consider me as SGI-USA for the same reasons. The only really important commonality is in chanting MRK. Get your Gohonzon if you really want to and chant and find your own way with clear eyes. You don't have to become anything but your authentic self.

Hi Nicki,

When I was a leader in SGI-USA, I had no end of problems because of my congenital inability to accept Ikeda as my mentor (among other things). Perhaps if you remain a general member, you won't have to. Even after I was no longer a leader, though, I was "reported" for not paying proper attention to Ikeda videos.

This online community has been very important to me. It helped me to see that there were alternatives to SGI for practice.

Michele

Thank you Joe and Michele for answering Nicki.

Both Michele and Joe practice(d) in Southern California where the SGI organization seems to be off track. If anyone should be kicked out of SGI, it's me. I own this wicked site! I have discussed this site with a vice-general director of SGI and they still didn't kick me out.

As to your question I think you should receive the gohonzon. It is not a requirement to pledge your undying love to anyone. Though there are only two SGI members writing here, everyone started in SGI. It is a good way to get started.

Nancy

Nancy,

A few years ago I developed a painful lump right under my right nipple. My doctor had me get a mamagram. Ouch! Really ouch! Expecially since I (being a dude) don't have much in the way of boobs, it was quite a trick to get it squeezed in there. Wowzer! And you ladies have to get these done every year?

You have my complete sympathy and understanding. Let's not talk about prostate exams, though.

Oh, it was just a little cyst thingie that went away. All's well.

Cheers!

Andy

Nancy, Joe, and Michele,

Thank you for replying to my comment. I received my gohonzon on Sunday. The day started beautifully. My hubby and 8-year-old son (who are supporting me but not taking this journey) came to the monthly meeting. The meeting topic was on arrogance vs. confidence--quite interesting.

My gohonzon conferral came toward the end of the meeting. My sponsor (who is a "sane" practitioner) was there to support me. Problem was, no one explained to me what "enshrining" my gohonzon would entail. My sponsor and one district leader were initially going to come to my home after the meeting and do the honors. Then an older woman in the practice invited herself. No problem...until we reached my front porch.

The red flag started waving when I greeted my neighbor. The older woman immediately asked him if he knew about MRK. Now, this woman has been in meetings where I've stated that I won't be proselytizing everyone I meet, that I respect people's religious choices, and that I don't assume that people who don't know about MRK are unhappy people. (Talk about arrogance!) In fact, I said that I was still exploring whether or not this path is for me. (I also had to reiterate this point to one of my leaders a few days before receiving the gohonzon after he told me that the meeting quota for August is 10 new people.)

I'll conclude by saying that I felt that my boundaries were disrespected before and after my gohonzon enshrinement. what had been a joyous morning became a very sad day and a sleepless night for me. I had been told that I could chart my own path in this practice and on my first day of membership I felt trampled on. I hadn't been "heard" by these people. (My sponsor, however, was great. I've known her for some time and she is never pushy and "truly" respects religious autonomy and diversity.)

I've been angry ever since and am trying to work through it. At the moment, I don't plan to involve myself with SGI meetings, gatherings, activities. A minority seem to respect people's differing inclinations and interpretations of the practice. I am no pawn, and, as someone who's worked in media for most of her adult life, can ferret out official propaganda in the SGI lit from the substance of the practice.

I haven't chanted since the enshrinement. I know that I can do the practice solo, but I feel as if I've been placated.

I welcome feedback.

Best,
Nicki

Nicki,

Oy!

If you want, go to my Joe Isuzu site here at Fraught With Peril and read Herding Cats and it will pretty much tell you what I think about this organization, where it's headed (and not headed) and why I came back after practicing solo for twenty years. Districts are places to practice with others, ask questions, create friendships based on humanism. But they are NOT all the same. The best response to those who act like a nimrod (and I don't mean a "skillful hunter") is your own absolute, unshakeable happiness. But that will take some effort on your part.

"All around there was a strange confusion...The spectators were quite transparent, and quite useless, and they all kept surging and moving away...Cincinnattus slowly descended from the platform and walked off through the shifting debris...Cincinnattus made his way in that direction where, to judge by the voices, stood beings akin to him."

Vladimir Nabokov-Invitation to a Beheading

Nicki,

Did they rearrange your furniture? I joined in 1972. After the enshrinement, I was really ticked. I think I stayed mad about that for 4 years.

To me, Soka Gakkai is an ultra aggressive network marketing scheme. The members do the leg work and earn psychic pay; like approval. Ikeda gets most of the profit. They spend a lot of the revenue arranging paid photo ops. He flies around the world, and stays in luxury hotels. When I think the suffering he [allegedly] endures more the sake of the members [puke], tears well up in my eyes. Those are not tears of joy. They are no longer tears of rage.

Now, Nichiren Buddhism is marvelous entry gate the Dharma. Soka Gakkai is even a fairly accessible entry gate to authentic Nichiren Buddhism. It took me 30 years to unlearn the superstitions, distortions, and loalty they crammed into my brain. I spent most of thirty years going around and around in circles.

In 2002, I found out there was more to the Internet than e-mail. There are lot of good sources of information about Buddhism. All those years, I heard people brag about fantastic benefits. I wondered what the heck I was doing wrong.

Now, the last years, learning real Buddhism, have been truly fantastic, beyond my wildest dreams. No regrets now, no grudges, no anger. With some fine tuning, Soka Gakkai could be awesome. I toyed with some internal reform groups. Then I realized Soka Gakkai does not wish to be reformed, It is what it is. LA, NY, DC; Chicago, that is the real Gakkai.

I did have some good years. From about 1979 to 1984 or so was good. I was in an outlying area practicing with very caring members. We were like a big functional family. Then we started growing and getting attention from the HQ, so they decided to teach us how to do it right. Ugh!

Sorry to go on like. You are among friends here. It would have been nice if I had someplace like this, to go and chat with sane SGI members 25 years ago; but life is what it is.

Gassho {palms together}

robin

Nikki,
Welcome to SGI. Now for the hard part, taking responsibility for your self. She was just doing what she does. She never thought about you, it doesn't matter. These old ladies never got out of the 1970's. But what matters is how you react. 20 years ago, I would feel just like you do. But now, I can usually just laugh that crap off. It has nothing to do with me. Your neighbor won't think any different of you because of that woman.

You have control over your own life... and you know it. You are so far ahead of everyone else. We have all been through it. We all started in SGI and some of us are still there. It is a good way to start, especially since you already found us. If you have an experience, question, complaint or comment, send it to me and I'll post in on the Guest site.