September 15, 2009
TUG OF WAR
My dog Celie was outside this morning when I started to chant. I could hear her come through the doggie door and back into the house. It’s a straight 60-foot shot down a hallway from there to where I sit. And I could see my little black speed racer, who I’ll match with any dog for a 60-foot race, tearing down the tile towards me with her tug of war toy in her mouth. She’s become part of my ritual. Or we’ve become part of each other’s. There are always a couple of forgotten dog items around my chair, which I pick up daily just like I used to do with my toddler children. But for the first five minutes of each morning and evening’s chant, I play tug of war with Celie. Then I play tug of war with myself. For everyday morning and evening when I chant I ask myself this: if my daily actions are predicated on my beliefs, then what do I believe and why do I believe what I believe.
I feel very appreciative to have the opportunity to ask those questions and a place to ask them. I feel even more appreciative to have a reason to ask them. Occasionally I conjure up a memory of an action, something I did or said or didn’t do or didn’t say, and find myself incredulous that I once believed that whatever it was, was without consequences. That I wasn’t responsible. That I was entitled. That I was justified. So I make a little vow to myself to try and not be repetitive and forgive myself. This requires patience. And I find the energy I need to keep on keeping on through my Buddhist practice and the support of my friends and the fellowship of others, Buddhist and otherwise.
I consider myself aligned to the SGI. There are those who therefore think I will practice and behave like how they believe an SGI member will practice and behave. And there are those in the SGI who don't think I'm a proper member if I don't practice and behave like they do. I practice Buddhism like an atheist. Well,…as close as can be done for someone who sits in front of an altar twice a day that is, LOL! Probably an incorrect analogy. Perhaps a better way to describe it would be "a healthy skeptic trying not to become a cynic". I try to keep any cult-ture out of my practice and this is reflected, or in this case not reflected on my altar: no water, incense, candles, greens, etc. There is an occasional note to myself, but that’s subjective, not cultural. Don’t use beads. Don’t genuflect to the Gohonzon when coming or going. In other words, most of the indicative actions of what someone else might consider propriety, I consider superfluous by the very quality of being indicative. The vow that I make daily to this external manifestation of my potential enlightened condition should suffice for it is already all that I am or can be. I guess I just don't want any religion in my religion. Tug of war. To put that all into one figure of speech, I don't need the beads. And I don’t begrudge those who need the beads when they use the beads. And I try to show the same patience to them as I do to myself if they take exception to my actions which are based upon my beliefs that have changed with time, experience, and the insight afforded to me by contemplating my life on a daily basis.
Hi, Joe -
I'm someone who doesn't need the beads, but I like them. The beads are an expedient. Heck, the altar itself is an expedient. If I really understood clearly, I suspect that even the Odaimoku is an expedient.
I can and have practiced for periods of time without beads, or an altar. I have learned, however, that I LIKE the ritual aspects of our practice. I enjoy it, and I get a different feeling from performing service in full ritual mode than I do in spartan mode.
Just another point of view......YMMV.
Namaste, Engyo
I recently removed the water cup, which I never used, and the fake greens from my altar. I remember in the early days of practice, we would sneak around the neighborhood cutting greens for our altar. Looking back, it just seems so wrong, but it was fun! I brought in a big green plant that was sent to me when Greg died. It has somehow survived for over a year. That is a record in our house. I use the beads because they were a present and, like Mike, I like them. BUT, my beads are from another sect, so HA! I may ditch the candle next - I just don't like it. But I do like the incense - the smellier the better.
"a healthy skeptic trying not to become a cynic"
I can relate to this. I was at a district and up meeting last night and we watched a bit of a video and Tarik(sp) was relating that he stopped PI on the way into a meeting and said (paraphrasing) "The members of SGI-USA, with heartfelt appreciation and a great seeking... blah,blah,blah" No one talks like that! Now, look what you did, you got me up on my soapbox again. Sorry to hijack your comments.
Love you!
Hey Mike,
Good to hear from you.
All good points with a view.
Looking up the meaning of expedient we find that the original meaning was neutral: convenient or practical in being beneficial or helpful. It also has a deprecatory sense in disregarding of what is considered proper as a stratagem. But some expedients are, as you have pointed out (so did Nichiren) necessary or essential. The object of devotion, the invocation, and the sanctuary become the the one great secret law: me, myself and I. That can only happen when you are born.
I like your approach here. Do you put up notes on your altar or write letters to the Gohonzon?
One thing that really freaked me out was when our Kaikan started using silk greenery and I've seen electric candles. When I moved away from the the SGI, I put two foo dogs at the corner of each side of my altar and lost the shkimi, putting up the occasional fresh cut flowers, as it seemed more beautiful. There's something very meaningful when you step outside tradition and personalize your altar. Pictures of loved ones are placed on my altar in an informal rotation to remind me of what's truly important. My wife even made me some custom juzu beads that are big enough to qualify as weapons, although I never thought that having and holding the beads did much more than keep me from scratching my bumm.
I'm also interested in any other customizations you have incorporated in your ritual and set-up.
Charles
Posted by: Charles at September 17, 2009 12:38 AM"custom juzu beads that are big enough to qualify as weapons"
LMAO! Chuck, you crack me up!
"Do you put up notes on your altar or write letters to the Gohonzon?"
Signing telegrams? Mostly just a word or two on a card as a reminder "to remind me of what's truly important" like "Don't kill anyone today." (I love you too, Nancy. XXOO)
"customizations you have incorporated in your ritual and set-up"
That would be the Nada Motif. I have a beautiful altar with nothing on it. I sit on this device, invented ages ago by cultures who's people apparently couldn't sit on their knees or squat on their haunches because they were tall and weighed more than 80 pounds, called a chair. If I was an Inuit say 150 years ago and by some chance practicing Buddhism would I be wearing saffron robes at -90F? As long as the periphery rituals don't become essential, who cares? Some really really do and that formality becomes an essential to their religion.
I love the dog photos! My dog seems to be attracted to the odaimoku- he usually curls up beside me to soak up the vibes. I even think since he has been with us and exposed to the energy it has enhanced his development in a positive way or maybe its just the parental love
and boundaries! for me I always felt like perhaps the ritual was born out of the many traditions - expedient older pagan styles? but also meant to ground us in a transition to that meditative state. A kind of gateway to help us get there. Yeah its expedient- and anything especially ritual can lose all sparkle in its rote
repetition and little personal changes certainly refresh the practice. I guess it comes down to what "works" for you. If greens beads and inscence feel like fluffy meaningless distractions and nonsense and hinder your practice then I totally get it. But me I've always loved the "mystic goodies" as I call them- inscence and candles etc. I find it beautiful and kind of inspiring. Maybe I'm nostalgic or something but I love mixing that mixture modern and old elements - comfy chanting chair- juzu beads. Good for you for staying in touch with your practice in such a way- it sounds vital and alive and aware- not an empty endless austerity butseeking straight to the heart of it actions/contemplation. thanks for reading.
Magnolia
Posted by: Magnolia at September 17, 2009 06:42 PMWe have a burl wood table (a slice of redwood tree that has been sanded and polished set on top of a gnarly piece of redwood root) in front of our altar that holds the candle and incense. While chanting last night, my candle sprung a leak out the back. I didn't notice until I was finished. The candle stick and table were covered in wax - like an Italian wine bottle. I took the candle stick away to clean it and didn't feel like replacing the candle. I didn't like the feng shui with the candle gone. It really bothered me. I found a little candle to put there.
Posted by: Nancy at September 17, 2009 10:29 PMHi!
Couple of comments. First, aren't all Buddhists atheists? And shouldn't all Buddhists be skeptics? I don't know why it is, but most SGI members seem not to know or heed Shakyamuni's words in tbe Kalama Sutta:
"It is proper for you, Kalamas, to doubt, to be uncertain; uncertainty has arisen in you about what is doubtful. Come, Kalamas. Do not go upon what has been acquired by repeated hearing; nor upon tradition; nor upon rumor; nor upon what is in a scripture; nor upon surmise; nor upon an axiom; nor upon specious reasoning; nor upon a bias towards a notion that has been pondered over; nor upon another's seeming ability; nor upon the consideration, 'The monk is our teacher.' Kalamas, when you yourselves know: 'These things are bad; these things are blameable; these things are censured by the wise; undertaken and observed, these things lead to harm and ill,' abandon them. "
Second point, regarding bowing to the Gohonzon, giving offerings, etc. I always remember the quote from Nichiren: "When you bow before a mirror, the image in the mirror bows to you." Best - Brian
Magnolia,
Thank you for your words.
My dog Celie, named after the character in Alice Walker's book The Color Purple, is a double metaphor for my personal tug of war about meaningless ritual that obfuscates Nichiren's revelation in the economy of reciting NMRK.
I have a friend, who I consider my mentor in studying this Buddhism, who can verbalize the way the Law functions in metaphor but it never seems like magic even if he uses the word magic, which he does. If I lived in an apartment again, I might put up a mini garden around my altar to symbolize my connection to the rest of the universe. But I already have one outside the home I live which houses me, the personification of the Law. But for some, that's not enough from me.
Hi Brian, great to hear from you.
"First, aren't all Buddhists atheists?"
Technically everyone is some version of an atheist. As Sam Harris has pointed out, everyone everywhere more than likely doesn't believe in someone else's deity whether it be Zeus, Allah, or Yahweh. But so many Buddhists practice with the same religiosity as either the religion they left for Buddhism, or with the need to express themselves in a way that will show others how faithful they have become: Born Again Buddhists. Indicative.
"And shouldn't all Buddhists be skeptics?"
Don't I wish! That would mean asking questions and overcoming doubts by individual effort, opposed to relinquishing that responsibility to someone else. But that's an environmental issue, neh?
Bowing is indicative too. Of course there are degrees of indication and those are varied depending on time and circumstance. In medieval times, a bow or kneeling was the same as a dog rolling over showing acquiescence to power or ownership. In Buddhism it is supposed to be a sign of respect. But so many times what I see in this action is individuals putting the Gohonzon outside of themselves. "Ask the Gohonzon". That's basically the same as theism. Maybe that's why Nichiren cautioning individuals to whom he bestowed the Gohonzon to "keep it on the down low". Maybe he was afraid everyone would get the wrong idea about what it was. Maybe he was right.
Posted by: joe at September 23, 2009 05:12 PMI like wooden beads. They ground me. I need that. I got tired of bumping my head in the ceiling. Plus, they increase the flow of prana in my hands.
Posted by: robin at September 26, 2009 05:22 PMHi Joe,
Really great post.
So much about my practice now boils down to remembering "...to show the same patience to them as I do to myself if they take exception to my actions which are based upon my beliefs that have changed with time, experience, and the insight afforded to me by contemplating my life on a daily basis."
It's just so easy to forget. Thanks
Bill
Posted by: Bill at October 9, 2009 11:08 PM