A Byrd's Eye View

Byrd:

Any critically thinking SGI Buddhist comes to this crossroad. One of the ideas that perplexed me was one part of my thinking process telling me that I was experiencing continual, confounding, horrific obtacles because I was doing so much for the Law and that each obstacle challenegd and overcome was merit in my karmic "bank-account." This "learned" thought process was countered by another voice in my head saying, I am experiencing so many troubles because a)I'm a fool that made errors in judgment b) this is botsu from incorrect actions, attitude, and practice c)the SGI way is askew d) all the above.

When contemplated, I had to reconcile the obvious. I had no money because even though I had a decent income, I spent virtually every spare dime on gas for activities, multiple subcriptions and zaimu, etc. In the process of contemplation, I had to reconcile and justify the plain fact that I had no money because it all went to promote and maintain the organization. The more I did, the more I struggled. This is proof? Of what? Endure and suffer because the more you suffer for the Law, the happier you'll be. I actually thought this was correct thinking. To make a vow, challenge yourself, to struggle, and eventually overcome are true to some degree. When your life is roiling in a soup of perpetual crap and you're doing what is prescribed and more, at what point do you admit that your life is crap because you've been fed crap? Buddhism is reason and at some point one must wake up to that facts. Once I did that, all crap stopped.

So one begins with your supposition. Where next? There's a long list, Byrd. Dai-Gohonzon, Nichiren as the true Buddha, aspire to be a leader - take responsibility, but don't seek to become a leader, vary from the mentor and burn in hell, the financial secrecy and "trust us," then flying staffers to Hawaii at our expense for a meeting of the big shots, etc. et al, and so on and so on.

Charles

Surely Byrd, this must be a personal invitation for me to comment! Finally, someone wants to talk about this stuff. I think you aptly termed these beliefs somewhere else as "wacky Gakkai myths", and yes, internalizing them as I did made me wacky. The one you mentioned, and then the laundry list from Charles. Funny thing about these beliefs - some I believed alot, and others not so much. Take the Dai-Gohonzon, and Nichiren as the true Buddha. I'm more of an in your face kind of person, so since neither the Dai-gohonzon or Nichiren were in my immediate environment, I didn't concern myself about them too much. I was quite the zealot when it came to proclaiming our teaching as the one true teaching. As far as I was concerned there was absolutely no truth to be found in any other faith. I had no problem refuting anyone who smelled of Christianity, or any other inferior teaching. They would bend to my will, and they would chant because I knew what was best for them. Lived that way for a long time.

Charles mentioned about not having money due to NSA related expenses. I didn't fall into that trap. My money was my money. Maybe it was because I worked so freaking hard for everything I had.

Fear based irrational beliefs ala NSA:

1) I can never, ever miss Gongyo. - That meant chanting at 4 am in an alcohol induced stupor after a night out (that I shouldn't have gone on. Bad YWD)

2)IF I miss gongyo, I risk the chance that something really bad will happen to my karma, and all the chanting I did in the past will be worthless because I broke the consistancy.
Just an invitation for sansho shima to enter my life.

3) I can never, ever leave the organization or worse, quit practicing Nichiren Buddhism. This is where the hell in incessant suffering is front and foremost. In order to solidify my faith I used to recite, "I Nichiren and my disciples..." in Japanese on a daily basis.

There's more, but I'm exhausted. Byrd, I think alot of this started coming out for me when I started working with victims of abuse. I'm loving the deconstruction. You go, girl.

The three obstacles are:

1. Earthly desires (bonno-sho), or obstacles arising from the three poisons of greed, anger and stupidity.
2. Karma (go-sho), or obstacles due to karma created by committing any of the five cardinal sins or ten evil acts (this category is also interpreted as opposition from one's partner or children).
3. Retribution (ho-sho), or obstacles due to painful retribution for actions in the three evil paths (Hell, Hunger and Animality). This category also indicates obstacles caused by one's sovereign, parents or other persons who carry some sort of secular authority.

The four devils are the hindrance of:

1. The five components (on-ma), that is, those hindrances caused by one's physical and mental functions.
2. Earthly desires (bonno-ma), or illusions arising from the three poisons.
3. Death (shima), because the fear and suffering that death entails, whether our own or someone else's can shake our faith and obstruct our practice of Buddhism, especially if death seems untimely.
4. The Devil of the Sixth Heaven (tenji-ma). This is regarded as the most serious hindrance; in Indian cosmology this king of devils represents the fundamental darkness inherent in life itself. This can assume any number of forms to obstruct believers and is often said to take the form of persecution by those in power. It is the most powerful of all the negative forces, and takes the form most likely to trouble us or cause us to suffer from doubt or illusion.

Do you disagree with this or with the way it was presented to you? I think you have to seperate the wheat from the chaff. Here's a PDF of the gosho

http://www.sgilibrary.org/pdf/077_0636.pdf

Hi Byrd,

This is great stuff that you're writing here. Funny too.

I am so glad I only stuck around NSA for two years. It is not that there is nothing to the idea of the three obstacles and four devils - but the way it was presented was just all twisted up. It was used by people who have only a very superficial idea of Buddhism (if that) to serve their own ends and not that of enlightenment. I am glad clown hidden posted the basic definitions (though I will quibble with those translations) - esp. bonno-ma as "earthly desires" which is not what bonno means).

The original purpose of this teaching from T'ien-t'ai Buddhism is to simply point out the human condition. We do have various defilements of attachment, aversion, and ignorance, we do have various dysfunctional patterns in our life, we do suffer from the consequences of unskillful actions, we do suffer from the weaknesses of the five aggregates, from various delusions, from fear of death (or confronting our own finiteness), and from a desire to stick with the "devil we know" (which is another way of looking at the Devil of the Sixth Heaven). And when we really challenge ourselves we will have to confront all of this - come face to face with ourselves and the dukkha or unsatisfactory nature of conditioned phenomena. There will be what psychology calls "resistance." This to me is just common sense - whether expressed in the metaphorical language of the three obstacles and four devils, or in the more clinical jargon of Abhidharma or psychology or what have you.

It is a shame this teaching was perverted into a means to coerce people for organizational ends. It is a shame it was oversimplified and turned into a form of superstitious or magical thinking rather than the rather sophisticated tool of coming to terms with the human condition that it was meant to be.

I think a bunch of people should get sued for Buddhist malpractice.

Namu Myoho Renge Kyo,
Ryuei

Hi, Clown - thanks for your comment,and for the link. I agree with you that I need to separate the wheat from the chaff- that's what the closet-cleaning/mind-cleaning process is all about.

With a slight bow to Michael McCormick, what you have cited is an accurate source of this teaching regarding Sansho Shima, but it is not what I absorbed and made a part of my practice for many years. What I absorbed was a lot more controlling and fear-based, designed to keep me (and to keep me keeping my "members") in a state of constant service to the campaign of the moment, less I "slacken even a little" and cause demons to attack me. As Ashley remarked, the problem is that I came to believe that progress in my life (or merely taking some time to look at my situation objectively) meant that I would be subject to attack from murky and ill-defined directions which were hostile to me because of my being a Buddhist. So, if I don't want to be attacked, I simply don't move. Ashley observed that her ability to "detach" from this fear came as a result of working with battered women. They, too, suffer from what some psychologists have called "learned helplessness."

Thanks to you all for writing in. I'm enjoying this forum very much. Best, Byrd in LA

I agree that these are functions that exist in all human life, no striving for greatness required.

The thing is what one person considers a perversion another will claim is making it applicable to the modern world. Who can say what is correct? I think somewhere it says the Buddha instructed to take up what you find to be useful for your practice. I'm sure that must vary from person to person.

I agree, Clown - this is why I have become such an avid supporter of the kind of "clearing-house" meetings found at the Ankers' home in Granada Hills. This is a place where you can learn all about the "hot dog" of Buddhism without being forced to eat a "bun" to which you might be allergic.

THanks for writing in, all - I can't tell you how much I enjoy reading the comments and engaging in the discussion. Best, Byrd in LA

Geez-- 17 years since the split and folks are still wounded:)
Byrd the stuff you described is codependent behavior plain and simple. A need to please, inability to say no and have decent boundaries...
Frankly there is a group that can help with these issues has been around for almost 70 years-- Alanon. It is spiritually based not religous, uses the the 12 steps and 12 traditions of AA.
I think many who have wandered through the path of Nichiren Buddhism have had some kind of connection to addiction and alcoholism in our families (and some with own addiction and alcoholism problems). Much of the crazy making behavior I see seems to be as much due to that as the old "japanese culture" issue.
I am grateful that I have found a way to address my resentment and anger dealing with fallible people (yes that is purposefully redundant). learning detachment as a friend of Bill W. and Lois W. has made it possible for me to focus less on the faults of others, blame fewer outside situations for my life's difficulties.
Thankfully given up my revenge and rescue fantasies. Moved from victim to survivor to thriver...

Thanks for the comment, Mimi - I have gotten a lot from the 12 steps, too. One of the things I like most is the ethical framework of the 12 traditions - a refreshing change from my primary sangha which doesn't have many clear "rules" for helping people enforce boundaries.

I'm sorry if you felt my post was aiming anger or resentment at fallible people (including me). It was intended to address a specific erroneous belief which I am trying to "wash" with my famous washing daimoku.

Moving ahead as well, Byrd in LA

Just important to wash with both sides of the cloth:)
I have enough to do with keeping my side of the street clean. If I spent all my energy ruminating over past wrongs and hurts done by others (and that includes some of the shenanigans I have encountered in 19 years of Buddhist practice), it is nearly impossible to move on...

I am glad Mimi mentioned the do-dependency and the 12 steps. I recognized my own co-dependency issues sometime during the late 80's. I read mostly Melody Beatty's stuff back then. What I failed to recognize until several years ago was that the organization served as a major player in a very dysfunctional system I had orchestrated in my life. I started practicing the 12 steps two years ago while attending AA meetings. The first step was so liberating for me. Letting go of all that need to control. ... Oye vey!

Hi Byrd:

Finally read your blog and I think your theme of cleaning out your old beliefs as being analogous to cleaning out some of the old junk in your apartment is a good one.
I think it's fair to say also that even the crappiest piece of junk was at one time useful and had value. The same goes for ideas. Yes it was a bummer that you once thought that your normal everyday problems wore messing with your spiritual growth, but on the other hand at least you had a notion that there was such a thing as spiritual growth and moving forward etc.. Some of the old NSA stuff was pretty crazy and maniputlative, but it did help even the dimmest bulbs reach a certain level of awareness. Now you get to move forward even further.

PS I usually refraimed from telling my shakkibuku that they would automaticly experience obstacles because they were on the path to enlightenment